Bakkiyalakshmi Raji
Bakkiyalakshmi’s son, Dillibabu, is intellectually disabled. His parents were unaware of his condition when they returned home after his birth. They quickly realized that something was terribly wrong as the child struggled to breathe. Dillibabu underwent heart surgery at KMC hospital to separate the valves that were joined together. It’s only after this operation that he was able to eat solid food for the first time. Till Dillibabu was almost four years old, the family were frequent visitors to the hospital as he also suffered with an irregular heartbeat. When he was better, Bakkiyalakshmi took him to a physiotherapist with whose help he learned to walk. The couple sometimes struggle to make ends meet as the husband is the sole bread winner. The sad truth is that instead of rallying in support, relatives and neighbors instigate them to give up their son, but kudos to this deeply committed couple, this is not going to be!

Bharathi S
Bharathi’s first child, Kishore, appeared healthy at the beginning but developed neurological problems that made him lose his speech and ability to walk. Her second child, a girl, is normal but her third child, a boy, is intellectually disabled. Both her sons appear to have the same disabilities for which there is no cure – the result of a consanguineous marriage. With no support from her husband or in-laws, Bharathi attempted to take her own life at one time. What kept her going was the love and affection of her children and she made up her mind never to give up so easily again. She is determined to focus on them. Finding the courage and grace to live one day at a time, Bharathi and her children manage on their own with the help of an Aunt. She has found the courage to journey on even in her most agonizing moments of weakness.

Gayathri P
Gayathri has two children. Her firstborn, Gaurav, could not speak until he was four years old. He also has ADHD and an autistic disorder. Gayathri had heard of OLR Special School at Madurai and decided to admit Gaurav there to receive special education, speech therapy, and occupational therapy. Gaurav learned to speak and draw, and practices yoga too. Soon he was placed in the third standard at Rajaparameshwari School. Tragedy struck when Gayathri’s husband passed away in an accident in 2017 but she ventured on. To be a better support to Gaurav, Gayathri completed her MSc Psychology degree at the Annamalai University and underwent special education training at the Tamil Nadu Open University. Today, Gaurav is in the eighth standard at Pakkam Government School, commuting all by himself. Bharathi is a strong advocate for special children and advises their mothers to work with the children’s abilities, providing them timely training and therapies to help them overcome their challenges. Gayathri is relentless in her quest to make Gaurav independent and teaches him as many new skills as he can master.

Indira P
Indira’s first child, Premkumar, suffered seizures after birth. He was in the ICU for a couple of days and his prognosis wasn’t good. A full body scan revealed that the child would have to receive physiotherapy. He couldn’t achieve the regular milestones of lifting his head, crawling or sitting. All he could do was smile, which melted his mother’s heart. Indira put Premkumar in Apparao School at Thiruvotriyur, and after two years he was able to meet these milestones, including standing. Premkumar has learned numbers and sometimes uses sign language to get around. Although her husband drinks, he supports her and their child. Indira has a strong spirit and says that it’s a parent’s duty to care for their child regardless of whether that child would look after them in the future.

Jayakantha R
Jayakantha has two sons of which the younger one, Parthiban, is a special child. The child did not cry at birth as all babies do, and was kept in an incubator for 22 days. He was diagnosed as a special needs child but the doctors pacified her that he would become normal after a certain age. Indira took him to several doctors for treatment but at 22, Parthiban still behaves like a child. Finally, a doctor suggested that he be admitted to NIEPMD at Muthukadu where he is currently being rehabilitated. Jayakantha struggles on alone since her husband passed away three years after they were married. Her brother used to take care of her and her sons but hasn’t been able to continue the care due to his own personal family problems. Jayakantha earns her living by running a little roadside tiffin shop.

Jayasri S
Jayasri wasn’t informed of her daughter Priyanka’s disability when she was born. The child did not cry at birth and could not achieve the development milestones as normal children do. The doctors she visited were not able to guide her properly. Until she was five years old, Priyanka couldn’t even get out of bed. But with a lot of therapy and medical help, Priyanka finished her B.Com Degree at Tagore College and is looking for a job today. This miraculous turnaround was possible only because of the love and support she received from her parents, grandmother, neighbors and relatives as they rallied around to help her get her life on track. This is undeniable proof that it does indeed take a community to bring up a child!

Malar M
Malar has three children, two of which have intellectual disabilities – Vignesh and Mythili. This is another case of a consanguineous marriage as Malar was married to her maternal uncle. The children did not cry at birth and it appears that this is a vital clue for mothers to note as it often leads to developmental delay in their children. Malar has been a regular at Egmore Children’s Hospital where she took her children for physiotherapy for years. Malar says that her neighbors and relatives often curse her for giving birth to special children as if it were her fault alone. Both children suffer the same disabilities – a direct result of her consanguineous marriage. She urges women to take note of these important considerations before agreeing to marry, as children are often the innocent victims.

Mallika Banu S
Mallika Banu’s mother passed away when she was just 17 years old. She continued pursuing a degree and took up a part-time job, marrying shortly after. Mallika Banu had severe depression during her first pregnancy and her child also did not behave normally. Two and a half years later the child was diagnosed with autism. The news was too much for her husband and he deserted them. Mallika Banu continued her studies and majored in Special Education at Bala Vihar where her son too was treated. She was encouraged to be a role model for special parents and she was happy doing just that. Then, her husband returned and they had a second son who turned out to be normal though he had a couple of seizures when he was a baby. One day, without her knowledge, Mallika Banu’s husband put their special child in an orphanage. Infuriated, she fought to get her son back. Today, mother and children live happily on their own without the father who appears to have abandoned them once again!

Radha M
Radha has six children of which the third (a daughter) and the fifth (a son) are intellectually disabled. She lost her daughter to tuberculosis but her son, Jesudoss, is alive. Jesudoss developed a heart problem at birth and was in and out of hospital multiple times. He is still on his way to becoming independent. Neither able to groom himself nor eat, Radha worries much about his future. She is teaching her other children to look out for their brother and doing her best to make Jesudoss as independent as he can be. Radha believes that a special child is a gift so unique as to be able to build up and strengthen families in compassion.

Sudha R
Sudha married young. Her firstborn, Indhumathi, is intellectually disabled. At birth, the child developed jaundice and had serious health issues. As Indhumathi grew, her parents took her to Hope Centre in Anna Nagar for physiotherapy and later to Anbumalar Special School, which was closer to their home. During the pandemic, the parents ensured that the physiotherapy continued at home. Indhumathi suffers with insomnia and her screaming often disturbs their neighbors. So, the family moved home. Indhumathi is being treated at Banyan for her insomnia. Ten years after Indhumathi was born, Sudha had a son who is a normal child. Sudha is lucky to have supportive siblings who helped sustain her family during the pandemic when her husband lost his job.

Suganthi S
In the eighth month of her pregnancy, a scan revealed that Suganthi’s child, Ajay, had agenesis of the corpus callosum (ACC), a brain disorder in which the tissue that connects the left and right sides of the brain (its hemispheres) is partially or completely missing. This condition is caused by a disruption of brain cell migration during fetal development. Due to this, Ajay had no cognitive, coordination, nor logical reasoning abilities. However, this didn’t deter Suganthi who enrolled her son in Gnanadeepam Special School where he is learning to become independent. Suganthi accompanies Ajay to the school daily and is very involved in the classroom activity. She has trained him to cross the road and use the bus. Having lost her husband five years ago, Suganthi moved in with her parents who help take care of Ajay. The boy’s cousins have taught him to read the newspapers, which is quite a feat for a child with developmental delay. Ajay also likes music and attends yoga classes.

Sundari T
Sundari married her maternal uncle and they had two girls – Bhavani and Selvi. Bhavani was born normal but had continuous fever for over ten days which caused multiple problems and development delay. The doctors confirmed that the consanguineous marriage had a large role to play in Bhavani’s disabilities. Sundari took the child to Periyapalayam for physiotherapy but the journey was often grueling in the hot sun. However, with continuous therapy Bhavani began to walk when she was almost three years old. At Anbumalar School she received further therapy and has become almost independent. Sundari’s second daughter, Selvi, developed serious vision problems when she was five years old. But there’s a happy ending to this story as the girl (although with much difficulty) completed her higher secondary examinations with a good score and finished her B.Ed. degree.

Susila R
Susila and her husband have three children. She had married her maternal uncle. Her daughter, Kamleshwari, was born with a cleft palate and is intellectually disabled. The child underwent multiple plastic surgeries to correct the deformity on her upper lip and palate. A school close to the government hospital where they went for treatment provided the child with physiotherapy, speech therapy, and special education, and Kamleshwari has made significant improvement. Susila’s husband is an alcoholic and the daily threats and battles are often more than she can bear. She takes Kamleshwari wherever she goes as the child would be beaten by her father when alone at home. Luckily for Susila, she has a supportive mother-in-law who takes care of the children whenever required. Susila’s neighbors often anger her with unwanted advice. They had goaded her into leaving Kamleshwari in an institution so that her normal daughter would get a marriage alliance. Luckily for Kamleshwari, her mother is a woman of substance and put the neighbors in their place. Today, Susila’s normal daughter is happily married and her son is completing his higher secondary education.

Uma R
Uma comes from a large family but after her father’s second marriage, she and her younger brother lived with their grandmother. Her marriage turned out to be a nightmare of violence and abuse but she did not confide in her family or her neighbors. She suffered the torments silently. Uma had two sons with her husband and the younger one, Abin, had many health issues. He became bedridden, fully dependent on his mother. Accusing her of infidelity, her husband continued to torment her and often locked mother and sons out of the house at night, leaving them defenseless. With the help of a good friend and a physiotherapist, Abin began to walk with support. Her elder son was very interested in sports and with his PT teacher’s help, applied for the post of a Sports Assistant. But months later, thinking of the abuse his mother and younger brother continue to suffer, he returned home to take care of them.

Usha Panneerselvam
Usha’s daughter, Preethi, appeared normal at birth but problems arose after six months. The child never smiled, often had fever, and did not appear to have good coordination. Preethi developed brain fever when she was one year old, which further damaged her brain. Later at Ramachandra Hospital, they found that mother and child suffered Rh incompatibility issues which had damaged Preethi’s red blood cells (RBCs). Subsequently Usha had a son and both her children were diagnosed as autistic. The parents worry much about the future of their children but are doing all they can to help them develop themselves. Preethi joined Opportunity School, Balar Kalvi Nilayam and by the time she was seven years old, she learned to speak. Usha and her husband manage to care for their children on their own and are determined to do so till the end of their days.